July 2020
Dinner Party
Look, my liege! Shut up! Will you shut up?! What a strange person. But you are dressed as one…I blow my nose at you, so-called Ah-thoor Keeng, you and all your silly English K-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-niggits! The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
Find out more »Cupcake Decorating
Oh God, my uncle. How am I ever gonna explain this? The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct. I want to come with you to Alderaan. There's nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and be a Jedi, like my father before me. As you wish. I don't know what…
Find out more »Weekend Long Adventure
Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot. You don't win friends with salad. I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. D'oh. A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it.
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